Momentary
by DyinggFlower
Summary: One girl is a damaged soul and trusts no one. The other, an obvious liar with a fragile heart. What if Esme Song and Zoe Rivas have a lot more in common than they think? Songvas/Zesme(?) Other ships may happen as well. Takes place after #SinceWeBeinHonest. TW: implied self harm, eventual sex, masturbation, language, depression, drug use & more.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: My first Degrassi fic I've ever committed to uploading on here. This chapter is short.**  
 **I am slow, but I want to get into this. I hope it continues leaving you all wanting more!**

* * *

The realization has suddenly hit me.-Miles Hollingsworth is out of my life. My bedroom has never  
felt so empty. My sheets felt cold and betrayed. My eyes are blank as I stare at my klonopins.

The bottle is within an arm's length, just as I'd left them this morning. I can take them. Shit, I can  
take five right now and I'd feel nothing. Regardless, what I felt now was meaningless. Then again,  
it might have been all along.

All of a sudden, I laugh. Quite audibly, even though it's at my own thoughts. As if I'd heard a joke  
and the smile that keeps tugging at my lips is a normal one. I myself can't even say if it's over the  
wasted time I never kept count of, or at how failed we were from the start. I'd be crying if I hadn't  
gotten that out of my system an hour prior to this.

I'm Esme Song,

and I'm backwards.

" _Don't make this harder. I'm trying to change."_  
Why did he fight me? Why did he want this?

 _"You don't need to change for me!"_  
My thoughts had spoke for themselves.

My feet had carried me as many steps as he took to walk away from me.  
Never was I so honest in my entire life. He tried to give me a rejecting stare,  
but I knew he was confused. It was as if I was the first person he'd ever  
heard those words from.

 _There's nothing wrong with us!_ I insisted.

 _What are you saying?_ He asked.

 _We should run away._

What a fool I was. He gave me one last look of vulnerability as our castle had crumbled.  
Miles didn't have trust in me anymore. He was picking up his own broken pieces when he  
didn't even have to. He didn't need to change, but he wanted to. He made his choice before  
my hand could reach his shoulder. All I had done was watch him slip from my fingers.

My brows suddenly furrow, paired with a sudden, pathetic stab of loneliness. I dismiss the  
memory-and the rest of them I have of Miles with it. His concerns. His face. His touch; but  
more importantly, the wanderlust we had shared.-The only thing that kept us from thinking  
too much about how much we're fucked up.

With a flick of the wrist, my braid is freed, and my long hair is sprawled over my shoulders.  
I lay on my side, and my gaze drops to my wrist. It had no scars. No wounds from any sort  
of blade. Why my brain whipped up that idea-just to keep a friends with benefits around,  
no less, was probably the stupidest thing I've ever done.

I cried suicide; scratched and clawed to make him stay, and it was all for nothing.  
It was over. He had picked the option of carrying the burdens of life on his shoulders again,  
and I wasn't a part of the new life he wanted. Maybe if I had been that kind of pitiful girl...

\- The one with the real tears and cuts on her wrist.

Would he had stayed?

I sit up, back straightening. I can't take it anymore. I grab the bottle on my nightstand and  
feel a rush from it's rattle. _Pop_. It's opened, and four of them land in my hand. I take them,  
and I lay back down, staring up at the ceiling. It's like some kind of relapse- taking them  
just because of someone else. Up until now, I have never been so impulsive with my benzos.  
I know I'll be high as fuck and that means I'm confined to my room and four days short of  
my regimen. For my well being, Miles will have to be forgotten now.

 _Never again._ I say to myself. I proceed to rid the word "normal" from my brain.  
I will never let anyone get the best of me again. And If I have to go back to  
being alone?

\- So be it.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thanks so much to MyFavouriteObsession for the review! If anyone can correct me on the time-frame between Next Class S01E09 and S02E04, I'd greatly appreciate it! Also, should I switch POVs or strictly stay on Esme's? Let me know!  
**

* * *

Eight months had passed since that day. Somehow, life is back to how it used  
to be for me. Colorless and boring. I'm the ordinary loner no one talks to once  
again. Akin to when I first transferred here, my friend count unfortunately  
remains at zero. But, did that even matter? Nope. Not one bit.

After the falling out, Hollingsworth (surprisingly) hadn't tarnished my reputation.  
As far as the student body knew, I was just another stuck up bitch that beckon  
the "privileged" rich family rumors. That was fine. I mean, If I bothered, could I  
make acquaintances here? Obviously. As long as there were parties involved,  
I'd work my charm and capitalize.

My grip tightened to my messenger bag as I joined the flood of students in the  
rat race to period two. The halls were, noisy, and painfully slow as usual. Most of  
the students in front of me suddenly stopped at the nearest monitor for the usual  
morning announcements we were all required to listen to. My eyes rolled. I hated  
standing around this early in the morning.

I gave the flat screen a glare when the person behind today's voice gave the  
camera the phoniest smile. My face twisted with implied atheism at the sight.  
Not even a pro manipulator such as myself could fake that huge of a grin.  
Gag. Did I mention I hated mornings?

"Good morning Degrassi students! Freshman seminar is canceled today but will  
proceed on schedule next Monday. In the meanwhile, feel free to stop by to  
audition for the recently green lit play, written and directed by Winston Chu!  
Auditions will be held after school from 4pm to 5..."

I gathered any recollection I had at the name with a sour expression.

Winston Chu? Wasn't he... his best friend? Wait, why do I care again? My vision  
blurred a bit as the klonopin was lulling me into a lucid spell. It eased my worries  
as usual as it's induced smile found it's way on my face.

For a moment, I feel restless, standing still as the rat race floods on forward.

 _What now?_ Should I join an extracurricular just for the hell of it? I tried to stifle  
my giggles when I remembered the play. I feel the huge grin spread on my face.  
Hell, It was an option. Shit, it could be my chance to add "Gifted Actress" to the  
list of what people think I'm good at. From what I hear, people just can't stop  
guessing what kind of girl I am.

One minute I'm an ice queen, the next, the kind of girl's who's out of everyone's  
league. I had nothing better to do, so It was worth a shot. Eh, why not? I trailed  
onward, and my usual walk seemed to clear the way of any faceless students in  
front of me.

Clearing my throat had beckoned them to do so. I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy  
it. My shrunken pupils scanned the now clear path. Was I really that feared? Or?  
 _God, that was great._

"Rude much." A group of girls I didn't know spat as I passed them by, my head  
held highly at the compliment. I smirked to myself. The males in the vicinity just  
ogled me as they watched me strut onward. I guess I couldn't really blame them.  
My tight, blue sweater was obviously to blame. I was just pleased when they  
finally cleared the way once I turned the corner.

A small group of students who stood in front of something had suddenly dispersed,  
and with them out of the way, I had taken notice of the bulletin board. And there it  
was-the signup sheet for the play I'm _that_ bored enough to consider. I sigh deeply,  
taking a loose grip at the dangling pen that was attached.

In perfect penmanship, I sign my name on a random line towards the bottom.  
Too late to reconsider now. _Guess we'll see where this goes today._

* * *

"Save yourself the trouble. Part's basically mine." A cocky brunette directed at me  
as she got off the stage. Clearly, she took notice I was next to audition.

"And you are?" I asked plainly. Nothing about that audition was eye catching. Well,  
the pink short sleeve she wore could count. It was more engaging to look at than  
whatever the hell that shit was. Did she call that "acting"?

"Zoë' Rivas." She eyes me with annoyance, as if she's surprised I don't know her,  
then smiles with a look of self-praise. "The girl who just nailed that audition."  
Are you trying to convince me? Or yourself? I thought, and nearly choke on my  
own laughter.

She puts on an overconfident front, and it's such bad acting, it's almost pitiful.  
I decide to go for a more direct approach.

"Are you joking? You looked like you'd rather walk on a bed of nails than kiss  
Winnie the Chu." It was mean, but it was true. I do recall him being in my History  
class now that I've seen him here. Let's be honest, he was a scrawny nerd. This girl  
would never enjoy playing the lead, and her audition made it painfully obvious.

Zoë' attempts to enlighten me, giving me a boring explanation on why she's  
getting the part. The cocky look she gives me is hilarious.

"He's had the hots for me since like forever." Seriously, this girl is transparent.  
Who was she trying to fool? I wondered then, should I play with her and knock  
her down a peg? I decide to lean in, unfazed, speaking softly to her ear just to  
piss her off.

"Forever was a long time ago." I pull away and notice her eyes drop down. She's either  
crushed from the false confidence I probably just stomped on... or she's looking at my  
tits. I look down at my own chest with an amused chuckle.

"Eyes up here, Zoë'." I taunt her playfully this time, and to my relief, she recovers  
quickly and throws me back a feigned grin. I didn't want to hurt the princess's feelings.  
God forbid she cried.

"I can't really blame you. They _are_ beautiful." I say to her slyly before heading up to  
the stage. After she gives me a cute little one-liner of "may the best girl win", I assure  
her she will. By the time Winston cues me to start, Zoë' is gone. Her confidence likely  
took a harsh blow from my taunting, which was a good thing. I needed this part to  
keep my dear father off my back, while I was at it. Dodging the 'friends' questions  
every dinner was becoming tiring, so this play would be a good diversion for a while.

Winston and I share the scripted kiss, and we pull away in a faux-lovingly fashion.  
The students that watched in attendance clapped at my audition. I look to Winston,  
who has a goofy little grin on his face. Yep, I had this shit in the bag.

* * *

I'm home, fresh out of the shower and lying in bed. I'm scrolling through the Face Range  
feed out of boredom. As expected, my father was simply gushing about me possibly being  
in the play. Dinner went well, and for once he didn't ask about my friend count. I knew I  
had the lead role nailed, and it would definitely keep him distracted for a while.

My gaze is drawn to the 'suggested friends' tab in the right. Zoë' Rivas is one of the  
names. I click her name, and I'm linked to her profile. For the hell of it, I send her a  
friend request. I doubt she'll accept. Back to the homepage, I idly scroll again to find  
something interesting. Out of nowhere, a bleep sounds as a chat pops up.

What's this? Zoë' Rivas has sent me a message.

 _Um? Why are you trying to add me? I'm confused.  
_

I laugh at what's on my screen. This girl was rude.. or was she? Was she trying to be  
strong after I stepped on her ego today? My fingers glide across the keys. I send her  
my reply.

 _Aw, are you still mad about today? ;) We aren't strangers. I just like to keep up  
with everything that goes on at Degrassi. People I don't even talk to add me on  
here. It wasn't personal, so don't flatter yourself._

I give my laptop screen a smug look, watching the symbol in the message pop up that  
signaled she was typing. I wait patiently. She seems to stop, and I get a notification  
saying that she accepted. After a minute, Zoë' replies. I have her profile open in the  
background, and I plan on laughing at her pictures for amusement. For right now,  
I read her response.

 _As if you'd effect me to that degree. My day was great even after your insults.  
Thanks for asking. Btw, Not flattered in the least. Nice talking to you, but I have  
better things to do. xo_

I laugh out loud, gagging at how transparent her replies were. Super defensive with  
a cocky front. I decide to stir things up a bit, clicking on her profile pictures album and  
liking a random one. Well, it did catch my eye. She was posing in front of her mirror in  
an admittingly cute pose, and her outfit was flattering. It was taken in the summer, so  
of course she's showing skin with a white crop top and denim shorts.

Who knew the little thing had a hot body? Within seconds, Zoë' messages me  
once again. How amusing.

 _What's with the like? Was that your way of mocking my outfit or something?_

Of course, I answer her with a condescending front just to get under her skin.  
The brunette is just way too much fun to get a rise out of. God, I wish I could  
read how her face looks right now. ;

 _Thought you had better things to do? ;) And oh no, the outfit was fine. Very Boho with  
the hat and crop top. It's just the caption made me die, so I had to like it. Didn't know  
someone who's thousands of miles from California could get 'Coachella Vibes'. Hilarious. _

Zoë' then sends me a slew of messages.

 _Jealous much? I don't think a girl who apparently wears different  
variations of skirts everyday can criticize MY fashion statements. _

_It was Coachella INSPIRED FYI, hence the caption.  
People loved the caption and agreed. _

_Look up 'inspired' and THEN you can get back to me._

Good talk, Esme. Hope you feel educated. Xo

At this point, my sides are aching! I'm laughing up a fucking storm. She was adorable.  
Transparent was definitely a trait that described this girl. I can say it a million times over.  
Once again, I got her panties in a bunch. Her attempt at talking down to me was less  
than believable. Desperate, really. No, I don't even feel an urge to defend the 'skirt'  
comment. I simply leave her with one last message of the night.

 _Got it. Total pro fashionista. Definitely can't get on your level. Too bad I can't say  
the same for your acting. Pretty sure I surpassed it today tenfold. ;)_

With that, I close my laptop and get ready for bed. I'll let Zoë' stew in her anger. For now.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Once again MyFavouriteObsession comes thru! Thank you SO MUCH  
for the review/for still following this fic! Your support keeps me motivated!  
All will be known as the story progresses~ For now, I will probably stay on  
Esme's POV. Enjoy! xo  
**

* * *

The next day at Degrassi goes by uneventful as usual, and before I know  
it, it's almost fifth period. I had a quick lunch and got to AP History early,  
enjoying the quiet solace as I'm glued to my textbook. Without much  
human interaction, I have more time to get ahead on studying. Getting  
to class early to do so alleviates a lot of stress,and gives me more time  
to relax when I'm home.

I hear footsteps as none other than Zoë Rivas makes her entrance, saying  
that she needs to ask me something. I shake my head, not really in the  
mood to be distracted. The klonopin makes me easily lose focus if I don't  
finish what I'm reading.

"I have a test to cram for."

Immediately, this girl takes it upon herself to close my textbook shut.  
I'm sort of in shock, near-disappointed at the possibility that she was  
doing it to be a bitch. Were the rumors true? Surely someone as unsure  
as the brunette was couldn't be _that_ simple. I still laugh sarcastically,  
giving her an annoyed response.

" Wow. So your reputation is totally accurate."

Zoë ignores my retort, deadpanning. She wants me to show her _how_ I  
auditioned? After I _already_ got the part? It was a little late to be sour,  
wasn't it? Still, her request was cute. I playfully stick the knife a little  
deeper.

"Aww, don't be mad. We did say let the best girl win."

Zoë doesn't even blink, and deadpans that I show her. The desperation  
in her voice was remarkable. Clearly, she wasn't taking no for an answer.

"Just show me."

Alright. If she wants to see it that badly, I'll humor her. I smirk, getting up  
to show word-for-word of how I owned my audition. Just as I was getting  
into it, Zoë's gaze drops. Ugh, De ja vu to when we first met. _What was_  
 _with her?_

I sigh, tilting her chin up with my index finger for her to look at me.  
I can't convince her of my theatrical genius if she doesn't look at me.

I continue, impatiently instructing her to say Winston's line when she  
tries to look away again. Her voice is shaking, and her gaze meets mine.  
It's as if she's whispering, not very confident in the line as she says it.

" Uh.. then you'll just have to kiss me."

I lean in as the script follows, pecking her on the lips with a moist and  
soft press. I can taste her gloss. Making sure I don't freak her out, I swiftly  
withdraw, encouraging her to say the next line. She's blinks at me and  
says that "it has to be a real kiss".

"And that's when I pull you in close, and then…"

As I move in, the brunette gives me this engaging stare. Before I know  
it, she goes in for the kiss herself, quite passionately I might add. Her lips  
collide with mine, and it stays that way for a while. She's warm, and she  
leaves my lips tingling from such brief contact. I'm impressed. No tongue,  
and yet it was filled with so much want. Where was this at her audition?  
I laugh genuinely.

"Woah! If you kissed Winston like that in the audition,  
you would've gotten the part for sure."

The moment the bell rings, Zoë just stares at me like a deer in headlights.  
All of a sudden, she seems.. freaked out? She tells me she has to go, and  
is met with my entire class looking at her. Some of the guys were obviously  
supportive of whatever they walked in on, and the girls just stared. I can't  
help but laugh, not really giving a shit at what part they walked in on.

Zoë leaves in a flustered hurry and no one asks me what went down.  
Must be my confident, "I don't care what you think" vibe. Our teacher  
walks in and we all take our seats. I can't help but smirk, rubbing my  
lips together to taste the faint gloss Miss Rivas has left me with.

Today was an interesting day.

* * *

The day is finished, and I take it upon myself to find Winston.-I mean,  
since the gala is just weeks away, and I figured today would be a good  
time to start rehearsing.. or at least to schedule it. I finally make my  
way to the council office, seeing him through the glass wall. I give him  
a smile excited to get stuff done as soon as possible.

" Winston! I was looking for you."

The slender kid turns to me, giving me a somewhat of a rejecting look.

"Uh.. Esme.. I was about to email you…"

None other than Zoë turns around, putting an arm around his shoulder  
as she gives me this smug, cocky look. I'm seriously confused at this point.

"Pardon, we're busy scheduling our MC rehearsals."

What the fuck? I look at the both of them, questioning if she meant the  
two of them. All the while, Winston is giving me this goofy little smile.  
His head turns when Zoë speaks.

"I managed to convince Winston that I was right  
for the part after all. Thanks for the suggestion."

This bitch. With the fakest smile I've ever seen, it tells me she did a little  
more than re-audition for him. Judging by the stupid smile on his face,  
they're going out. I mirror her expression, accepting this outcome. Still,  
I'm pretty fucking pissed. This is why friends are impossible to make here.  
Everyone's out for themselves. Little miss confidence issues clearly wasn't  
an exception.

"I'm sure you'll do great."  
I say before taking my leave.

* * *

I'm home, sprawled out in bed with my phone in grip. I'm tired, and the  
ending to my day at school still managed to fuck up my mood. I'm almost  
tempted to text Hollingsworth, but I know he's done with me. I'm angry  
and I can't help but feel betrayed. I gave the girl advice, only to have it  
used against me. I had to admit, I didn't see it coming.

The kind of mood I'm in usually makes me want to break something, or  
fuck the shit out of someone to blow off steam. Considering I'm too tired  
to get up, the latter is more appealing. Too bad Hollingsworth was with  
Tristan again. God, I need a friend at a time like this. Friends were at least  
a useful distraction from bullshit.

All of a sudden, my attention is drawn to Hastygram. Zig Novak just liked  
one of my photos. Come to think of it, he's been flirting with me on and  
off the past couple of weeks. I'm sure it's to piss him ex off, considering  
she sits across from us. Still, I shoot him a DM for the hell of it.

 _Can't tell if it's the outfit you liked or the fact that thirteen  
other girls are __wearing a similar one. Black pleather shorts  
your thing?  
_

I'm referring to my dance troupe that I took a group shot with. They're...  
sort of friends, but they're my rich friends from dance class. They go to  
different schools and they're kind of superficial to keep in contact with.  
We dance as a unit to make extra cash. Of course for them, it's simply  
something to brag about to colleges. They all have different dreams of  
making it big, so for the sake of variety, we plan on doing Kpop routines  
this year. I surprisingly get a DM back from him.

 _Not gonna lie, the outfits are pretty hot. Wish it was taken  
from a more... rear ended angle. Better lighting for sure. ;)_

 _P.S. I'm sitting with you_ _in Tech tomorrow.  
Just letting you know._

How have I never noticed this guy? Well, maybe it's because he has  
yet to invite me to lunch. He has friends, so I took the flirting with a  
grain of salt. Maybe I should take it more seriously? He likes another  
one of my photos without missing a beat. This time, it's a selfie that  
I posted a few days ago.

 _Because I'm totally not an excuse to get your ex's  
panties in a bunch? __Can't say I mind your company,  
though._

He gives me a fail-worthy pickup line.  
I laugh so hard I nearly choke.

 _Maybe I'd rather have your panties... in a bunch? ;) Jk jk_

I make a point to tell him "A for effort" and our cute banter continues.  
Eventually, Zig lets me know to look out for him tomorrow. Him and  
his friend Tiny are competing for some kind of job? He doesn't wanna  
spoil anything yet, but he assures it'll start commotion.

I end the convo with a good night and a few heart emojis, and he does  
the same. I don't expect much from this, but it was cute he apparently  
seems interested. I needed to get over what Zoë did, anyway.

I shift comfortably I bed, my braid freed. I shut my light off, and my  
hand wanders between my legs. Fuck, this guy got me in a good mood.  
It wasn't necessarily him that turned me on. Maybe it was the attention  
I got off on. Novak was definitely expendable, but that didn't mean I  
couldn't enjoy it while it lasts.

I press my fingers against my clit, rubbing over the fabric of my sleep  
shorts. My eyes close and I moan softly, turning on my side to feel  
more pressure. Fuck attachments. I had a good feeling this possible  
fling would be worth trying out. I touch myself until I fall asleep.

Perhaps tomorrow was something to look forward to after all.

* * *

 **A/N: This was a boring one! :( I'd love to hear any suggestions on where  
to take this next! I might fast forward a bit from here on! Esme and Zoe  
will definitely come into contact again! Just trying to keep stuff somewhat  
canon in terms of timeline! Please review! xo**


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N: I'VE BEEN FOLLOWING THE CANON TIMELINE/EVENTS BUT I WILL BE EXPANDING FROM HERE! DEFNITE FIC EVENTS WILL NOW HAPPEN! ENJOY! AND PLEASE REVIEW! :D**_

* * *

Mid-day at Degrassi. I'm wandering the halls, suddenly hearing commotion  
just up ahead. It's a free period, so I follow the source of it, only to find to  
what appeared to be.. a dance battle? Between Tiny and Zig? I watch from  
a vantage point, peeking in. Zig's moves were underwhelming. He moved  
stiffly and was clearly overconfident. Tiny proceeds to wipe the floor with  
him, and I can't help but pity my current conquest. He was just massacred.  
It was no contest. I decide to make my entrance, ready to enlighten him _._

"He's right. He totally got you."

"Like you're some expert."  
Zig rolls his eyes, sour at his loss.

"Twelve years of dance training gives me a little cred, yeah?"  
I don't miss a beat, and I make it clear I'm to be taken seriously.  
My pitch lowers, and I give him a flirty, welcoming look. I tell him  
I'm around if he needs lessons. It's too comical when Zig evades  
the offer. Changing the subject much?

"Well thank you, but I think this guy should be taking lessons from me."  
I want to roll my eyes as he gives Tiny a playful nudge. He leaves, and  
I'm left with Zig staring back at me. His smirk is annoying enough to  
walk away from. I give him an even cockier look. I'll leave him high  
and dry if he thinks he doesn't need me.

"Good luck."

To my delight, he follows me like a stray puppy. With Tiny gone, he finally  
confesses that he indeed needs my help. I taunt him, letting him suck up  
just a little bit. God, the compliments were too good. Zig was desperate,  
playing the "I need this job" card. At least he threw in a "please". I love  
it when people grovel. I let out a sigh. This kid better be serious.

"Okay.-but on one condition. You be ready to work. _Hard_."

* * *

School is over, and I'm helping Zig train at the gym. My formally trained  
eye follows his movements carefully as he dances to a contemporary track  
I've chosen. Thirty minutes in, and he's hardly gotten better. I don't get it.  
It was a simple routine. Did he have a losing attitude or could he just not  
do it? I stop the music with a push of a button, unable to watch any  
further off-beat arm flailing.

" Your arms need to be stronger. Go again."

He's all sweaty, but gives me a look that says he'll continue. I start  
the music again, and he attempts the move for the hundredth time.  
For such a physically fit guy, why did he move his arms like a pansy?  
I roll my eyes and stop the music. My patience is running thin.

"Strong arms! Go again."

I watch Zig take a defeated walk to the bleachers, slinging  
his backpack over his shoulder.

"Why? So you can tell me that I'm doing it wrong again?"

God, Novak was a cry baby. Still, I can't help but question who hurt  
him, in an attempt to figure out the situation. It was _just_ a dance  
routine. It wasn't like I told him he was fucking up something  
serious.

He answers with "No one! It's me" "I can't do anything right"

 _Blah, blah blah._

It immediately leads to a pity party over himself, his friends, and his  
ex. I snap him out of it, letting him know to wake the fuck up and focus.  
I give him a much needed pep talk. Dance was about confidence, and  
fighting doubt. It was a psychological fight in It's own right.

"….So forget about her and FIGHT it. Do you think you can do that?"

After a moment, Zig complies.

"…Yeah."

Without wasting any time, we pick up where we left off. We have less  
than an hour until this free period is over. I play the track again, taking  
a seat to watch Zig go again. Fingers crossed we make progress from  
here.

* * *

I was exhausted when I got home. Training Novak took a lot out of  
me, so I took a bath and went straight to bed. It's the next morning,  
and I'm making my way to fifth period. I pass pretty boy and his  
friends on my way there, and for some reason, he's unbuckling his  
pants? And holding a small box of… sexy underwear? I walk over to  
them to lighten the mood.

"Um, I don't think that meets the school's dress code."  
I laugh, asking him how the audition went.

Zig smacks his lips, inhaling sharply.

"Well… turns out it was to be a stripper.  
Go ahead, laugh… I'm-already used to it."

I want to at least snicker, but the poor boy's pride was hurt way  
before I got here. His friend's faces said it all. I was more upset  
about the wasted time, considering he worked hard. I give him  
credit where it was due, then remind him of my troupe. It isn't  
very consistent money, but I tell him he's welcome to join.

"You want me to dance with you?" Zig asks with near-skepticism,  
grinning.

"If you want. You don't even have to get naked.- _for the audition_."  
I coyly leave him with that to think about, walking away with a  
sway in my step.

I mean, I _did_ invest my time to sharpen his dancing skills.—he can  
easily make it up to me with sex. Who would've thought I'd find a  
useful replacement for Hollingsworth? I know nothing's guaranteed,  
but It was still something to look forward to.

Currently, I was now on my way to Biology. And then? The unexpected  
happens. I touch shoulders with none other than Zoë Rivas _._ Apparently,  
she was too glued to her phone to watch where she was going.

Ironically, I haven't seen her since Tuesday's History class. It sucks she  
redeemed herself with that project on Japan.—It was way too much fun  
pissing her off over it. I clear my throat, and the brunette finally looks up.  
I throw a question her way, glancing at her phone.

"Apparently Hastygram is more important than watching where you're  
going?" I take a peek at her screen, and in a panic, she quickly tries to  
hide it from me. I obviously give her a puzzled look. What the fuck was  
that all about anyway? The ex actress finally graces me with a response,  
trying to evade me.

"H-haven't you ever heard of privacy?  
Anyway, I can't bother with you. Gotta go to class."

It was only for a second, but I could have sworn she was looking at something…  
depressing? I turn to face where she was headed, lightly grabbing her forearm  
to stop her from escaping. Zoë flinches, jerking me away. I can't help but squint,  
noticing she was holding to part of her forearm. She winces and proceeds to  
raise her voice.

"What the fuck is your deal?!"

People are looking at us, and I'm laughing off the embarrassment. I roll my  
eyes, grabbing Zoë by the hand to talk somewhere private-whether she likes  
it or not. This was not normal behavior, even for her. I lead her to an empty  
dead end just around the corner.

"What the hell, Esme! Let me go!"

I gently turn her arm over, confused at the sight I'm met with. A burn mark,  
just beneath her wrist. Why would she bother hiding it? Unless- _No.._ This girl  
isn't doing this to herself… _is she?_ Zoë's gaze drops, and she falls silent.

I have my answer. My own gaze on her softens, and my thumb gently  
caresses her arm just a few inches above the wound.

"Why? Why are you doing this to yourself?"

Zoë can't even look at me. Her voice starts to shake.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about…"

I decide to take the opportunity to snatch her phone from her grip, looking  
at the post on the screen. Her eyes widen when I show it to her myself.  
I almost can't believe what I'm doing, but she has to face reality.-  
She has to know that someone just _might_ give a fuck about her.

"This. **This i** s what I'm talking about _."_ I gesture to the self harm post.  
It showed a bandaged wrist, atop of it read the word "help" in sharpie.  
Zoë tries to deflect, grabbing the phone out of my hand before putting  
it in her bag. Her brows furrow, and her gaze lies to mine.

"….L-look, whatever, okay? I'm perfectly fine!"

I roll my eyes and let out a dry chuckle. Now was _definitely_  
not the time for her bad acting.

"You're a fucking idiot, you know that, right?" I can't take it anymore.  
With my free hand I pull her into an embrace. Zoë gasps faintly, and  
I say nothing as I stroke her hair. She's trembling, shakily placing her  
hands on my back to return the hug. Finally, she's crying quietly over  
my shoulder.

We stay like this for a minute. Reality hits me when no one else is in  
sight. We are both officially late to class. I finally break the silence,  
speaking close to her ear.

" I won't tell anyone, but you're coming to my place after school.  
I'll message you during eighth. No running away, got it? "

Zoë looks up at me, sniffling and wiping away her own tears. She knows  
I won't take no for an answer, but as we pull away and begin walking,  
she finally speaks again. Her class is just a few doors down. Mine is  
the opposite way. She better be grateful I walked her this far.

"Why are you being so nice to me?"

I sigh deeply and roll my eyes at her denseness. Is she not used to  
being _genuinely_ cared about during a tough time? _Shit. We just might  
have __something in common._ I start to walk the other way to my class,  
but I turn to face her before I go.

"…Why not?" I grin, then take my leave. I don't look back, but I get a  
feeling Zoe is content with my answer. I hear her footsteps tread in the  
opposite direction. I, too, scurry to my class with an excuse ready.

* * *

 _ **A/N: TO BE CONTINUED! :D**_


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